Read Novel Full Chapter 131, Taxidermy and Proposal
Chapter 131, Taxidermy and Proposal
Translator: Barnnn
Ize darted forward, narrowly avoiding a thick vine that curled up from the forest floor. With the help of her Fleet Foot skill, she ran lightly along its length, then drove her dagger into the base of a bloated, sickly purple flower.
Severed from its head, the Mystic Plant writhed and twisted, flailing blindly toward its prey below — until a violent gust of wind roared up from beneath, shaking its broad leaves and scattering its momentum.
“Fieda!” Ize called.
“Got it!”
With a short breath and a flicker of light, Fieda unleashed a flash of surgical precision. Limbs severed and core exposed, the Mystic Plant gave no scream; it only coiled in on itself, collapsing into a shriveled husk and shrinking until nothing was left of it but a single seed.
“All right, that’s done,” Fieda said. “Nice decoy work, Ize.”
“Thank you. It was kind of fun, actually. Felt like a rollercoaster.”
“I nearly had a heart attack when it flung you into the air.”
“It was like bouncing on a trampoline,” Ize said cheerfully.
“As long as you’re not hurt,” Fieda replied. “But don’t let your guard down.”
“Mm-hmm. I’ll be more careful.”
Ize tucked the seed into her Magic Bag, then projected her Map while Fieda’s Overview skill overlaid new data onto it. The group began discussing their next move.
“Next one’s in the back left section,” Fieda said.
“Got it. Three left?”
“That’s what I thought… Wait, didn’t we take out more earlier?”
“I think we’ve got six seeds now.”
“Six? Really?”
“Yup. Remember when Hal got carried away and tangled a few of them together with wind magic?”
“Oh… uh, maybe I did that,” Hal said, scratching the back of his head.
“You did,” Fieda confirmed flatly. “Well, let’s aim for something else next. Wasn’t there a quest for something on the seventy-second floor?”
Hal rifled through his notes, mumbling to himself as he flipped past pages cataloging harvested Mystic Beasts and Plants.
The Speraniessa Dungeon’s sheer number of floors meant it was impossible to remember where everything spawned. Perhaps the local Guild staff and adventurers could manage, but the group wasn’t about to memorize it all in just one season.
“Doesn’t look like we’ve got any quests for that floor, actually… but I wouldn’t mind grabbing some Tunatton.”
“Oh, and while we’re at it, how about some Ginger Bats?”
“Right, those and Orc meat made a great combo.”
“Nothing beats ginger pork with rice,” Ize sighed dreamily. “But I’m also starting to crave some bull hot pot.”
“Ah, right,” Hal repeated wistfully. “Bull is good, too.”
As they exchanged culinary fantasies, the three made their way toward the habitat zones of their next targets.
“Tunatton are by the water, and Ginger Bats come out a bit later. Should we make camp after hunting the fish?”
“Sounds good,” said Hal.
“Understood,” said Ize.
Tunatton, resembling oversized tuna, typically proved troublesome due to their aquatic habitat. But Hal’s improved control over lightning magic had made hunting them almost too easy. While he hadn’t yet mastered precise strikes, he could now at least avoid blowing a whole lake up.
Granted, they’d had a few incidents involving dozens of dead fish floating belly-up after a misfire… but each mistake had taught Hal something new. So it was fine. Probably.
“We’re not going down to the eightieth floor this time, right?” Ize asked.
“Yeah, probably not,” Fieda replied. “…Hal, what’s with that face?”
“What? Nothing! I totally support this decision. Though, personally, I wouldn’t mind going deeper. We could stay for another week, even! That’s totally fine with me!”
“Listen, Hal…” Fieda sighed, exchanging a look with Ize.
“We’ll worry people if we stay too long,” Ize said gently.
“Then let’s go back for like five minutes and come right back to the Dungeon.”
“But I want to explore Speraniessa too,” Ize pouted. “We’ve barely tried any of the local restaurants. You’re curious too, aren’t you, Hal?”
“Ugh… Well, yeah, but…”
“Give it up, Hal,” Fieda said with a smirk.
Faced with Ize’s unassailable logic, Hal slumped his shoulders in defeat. Fieda, watching him pout like a scolded child, let out a long sigh… as much to clear his own thoughts as to express his exasperation.
[If only the Lord would intervene somehow…]
And so, he gave up and dumped his vague hopes on the city’s highest authority.
◆
A few days later, the trio finished their round of exploration and returned to the surface through the Portal on the seventieth floor.
Unlike in Jasted, Speraniessa’s Dungeon exit was little more than a gated fence. A short walk brought them to an improvised Guild outpost, where they filed their departure paperwork.
The main street began right outside the exit, and when they reached the Adventurers’ Guild, they found it as crowded as ever. Avoiding the busier counters, they queued for one manned by an older, quieter clerk and passed the time chatting.
“Do we need to pick anything up on the way back?”
“Silk Toad’s probably sold out by now,” Ize said, disappointed.
“I wanna check out that Indian curry place in the west district,” Hal added.
“That’s way too far from the manor,” Fieda chided.
“Tch. Busted.”
The curry shop claimed to follow the recipe of a Hero from a few generations ago — a man from India, supposedly — and was famous for sticking close to the original flavors.
Even Hal had to admit it was a bit much after a Dungeon run. Fieda gave him a gentle pat on the head that was more mussing than affectionate.
“How about we just head back and rest?”
“Eh… not yet,” Hal muttered.
“Didn’t you say you wanted to try making tuna and avocado salad?” Ize reminded.
“Oh, right! Then we need to stop by the produce market! Avocados are sold at greengrocers, right?”
“I believe so. If not, we can ask someone there.”
“Perfect!”
Grateful for the excuse, Hal brightened immediately and began rattling off other tuna dishes he wanted to try.
Fieda exchanged a look with Ize… and sighed. His thoughts were already on the person they’d have to deal with back at the manor, and the inevitable awkward mess he’d bring.
◆
As they crossed the manor’s garden on their way to their rooms, a slender man emerged, his bright voice calling out from the gazebo.
“Oh, Ize, how I missed you! Welcome back! So, have you decided on a date for our wedding?”
“Stay away from her, you damn lecher!” Hal snapped.
“H-Hal… please,” Ize muttered, wilting.
“Come now, look over here, Ize,” the man said warmly. “I really think this time you’ll like what I’ve prepared.”
Taking Ize’s hand with practiced flair, he led Ize not to a bouquet of flowers or a romantic gift, but to a towering, upright figure looming beside the gazebo.
It was a taxidermied Blood Bear. Nearly three meters tall, it loomed like a sentinel carved from nightmares.
Ize stared, stunned. Any other woman might have screamed or fainted.
“U-Um… it’s… quite impressive,” she managed at last. “But I’m not sure I really need a Blood Bear… trophy…?”
“Is that so? My brother was thrilled with it,” the man said brightly.
“Sir, that’s not the point…”
Next to her, the tanned man — Loudipa, officially the rightful Lord of Speraniessa — beamed with pride.
Having been unconscious for four years, all authority had transferred to his brother, Gruash, who still acted as regent. Restoring Loudipa’s title would require formal reinstatement from the Capital.
[Not that any of that matters right now, dammit!]
Hal could only scream in his mind and stare in horror as Loudipa, still gripping Ize’s hand, looked far too pleased with himself.
◆
Loudipa had regained consciousness around twenty days after the commencement of his new treatment program.
Every day, Ize and Hal had taken turns checking on him — casting healing magic, running diagnostic Appraisals, keeping track of his condition. When the news came that he had finally woken, both of them let out a long sigh of relief.
And though neither said it aloud, each secretly hoped that this meant they might soon be free to leave the Lord’s manor.
With that faint hope, they had made their way to the convalescent wing.
“Miss Rossalie, how is the patient doing?” Hal asked politely.
“His mind is clear, and he can drink soup on his own,” Rossalie replied with a tired smile. “Would you mind appraising him, just in case?”
“Of course.”
…And that was the last moment Hal managed to remain composed.
The instant they stepped into the bedroom beyond the sitting room, a voice rang out from the bed, where a man sat upright, grinning from ear to ear.
“Oh? Are you two my angels? How lovely! Would either of you care to become my wife? I’ll gladly take just one if two is too much to ask!”
Ize and Hal froze in the doorway. Behind them, Fieda stopped short, nearly bumping into them.
Though Loudipa’s frame was still thin from the long coma, his complexion was healthy, and his eyes glittered with vitality. Perhaps a bit too much vitality.
“Um… what?” Ize blinked.
“Lou, that’s hardly appropriate,” Rossalie scolded, flustered.
“Is it? I’m quite confident I could love them both equally,” he said with a cheerful shrug.
“…Oh, great, he’s a pervert,” Ize muttered under her breath.
“Oh, that’s no way to speak, my angel,” Loudipa chided, wagging his finger from side to side with exaggerated disapproval. “Tsk-tsk-tsk.”
“Nah, you’re TOTALLY a pervert, old man,” Hal growled.
“That’s a dreadful mischaracterization, young man. Age is nothing but a scale invented by society. The heart knows no boundaries.”
Rossalie let out a mortified gasp and looked away. Ize, meanwhile, was already hiding behind Hal’s back, peeking out cautiously. Hal glared at Loudipa, practically vibrating with suppressed rage.
Loudipa’s older brother, Gruash, had become an A-rank adventurer at thirty-four and had fought in the Deluge two years later; that would make him about forty now.
If Loudipa was ten years younger, as the records suggested, then he was thirty; even subtracting four years he had spent in a coma, he would still be too old to hit on Ize and Hal, who were both fifteen. Not only that, but in this world, Ize’s appearance was considered younger than her age.
Conclusion: Loudipa = Pervert
Hal clicked his tongue as he stared at Loudipa’s chestnut hair and amber eyes.
“You and your brother really don’t seem alike,” he said coldly.
“Oh, I don’t know,” Loudipa replied with a smirk. “We both love deeply and faithfully. Isn’t that right, dear sister-in-law?”
“H-huh? Oh… yes, I suppose…” Rossalie stammered, flustered by the sudden turn in the conversation and the unexpected use of “sister-in-law.”
“Well, let me be clear,” Hal said firmly. “I have no intention of becoming your wife, lover, or anything close to any of those.”
“A tragic rejection…” Loudipa pressed a hand to his chest, tilting his head as if he’d just been struck by Cupid’s worst arrow. “But perhaps you, angel girl, could at least soothe my wounded heart? I’d never ask for just your body, of course, unless…?”
“Don’t say it like that, you freak!” Hal snapped.
Loudipa met Ize’s eyes with a theatrical pout, framing his face with both hands.
He looked almost exactly like Gruash, save for the different hair color… but his mannerisms, his voice, and every ridiculous word out of his mouth turned that resemblance into a lie.
Trying to salvage the situation, Ize poked her head out from behind Hal’s shoulder and said,
“Um… shouldn’t we check his health now?”
“I’ll save you the trouble,” Hal said flatly. “He’s in perfect condition. Healthy as a horse. Mind and personality excluded; we can’t fix those. Okay, our business here is over. We’re LEAVING.”
“Wait, angel boy, one last question?”
Hal stopped at the door and spun around, scowling. “What!?”
“Tell me: how many types of toxin did you find in my body?”
Hal narrowed his eyes. “…Two. A paralytic agent and one that slowed blood flow.”
“Thank you,” Loudipa said with a satisfied smile. He let himself fall back against the pillows. “It’s been a while since I’ve had such a fun conversation. I hope you’ll visit again?”
“That depends on your behavior.”
“So serious, angel boy,” Loudipa said, chuckling to himself.
Hal snorted and turned away, storming toward the door.
“Take care,” Ize murmured as she followed.
Fieda came up behind them and caught Hal’s arm.
“Hal. Wait.”
“No. Not now, Fieda. Let’s just get to our rooms before I explode.”
“Hal…”
Hal had never looked so visibly furious before. He marched down the hallway like a storm, and the other two kept close behind.
The moment they reached Fieda’s room, Ize cast a heavy Stealth field to ensure no one could overhear.
Then Hal exploded.
“DAAAAH! That damn pervert! I should knock him unconscious all over again!”
“Hal!?” Ize gasped.
“What the hell is going on here?” Fieda demanded.
“I should’ve noticed the title!”
“…Title?” Ize tilted her head, confused.
Fieda’s eyes widened. “You mean like those special epithets you only get after mastering something? I’ve heard not even one in ten thousand adventurers ever gets one.”
“That’s exactly it!” Hal snapped. “You know how rare those are? And THAT GUY has one! Do you know what it is!?” He tore at his hair in frustration. “Seriously, we should render him comatose again! RIGHT NOW!”
“That would be a crime,” Ize said quietly.
“Then screw it. Ize, we’re leaving this city. If we hurry, we can make it to a bigger town before winter hits.”
“Wait, Hal. Calm down,” Fieda said, grabbing his shoulders. “Explain it properly. What did you see?”
He forced Hal down into a chair, though his legs kept bouncing restlessly. Ize stood nearby, eyes wide with concern.
“Tell us, Hal,” Fieda repeated. “This title… it’s not just about him, is it? It has something to do with Ize, or maybe with you. What did you see? What does it mean?”
Hal took several shallow breaths. He licked his lips, closed his eyes for a moment… and finally, with a grimace, he spoke.
“…His title is ‘Lover-of-All.'”