Incurable Pain

IP Chapter 60

Incurable Pain | Chapter 60

In the Spider-Man movie, there was a line, “With great power comes great responsibility.”

This line doesn’t just apply to superheroes who can do anything, but to every moment and detail in life, it’s evident everywhere.

When we were young, parents would compare children with poor grades to excellent students, often mentioning “other people’s children” without realizing how much effort “other people’s children” put in to become role models, far more than the playful children.

Growing up and going to school, teachers select the best students to be class monitors, expecting them to demand strict standards from themselves in every action.

Not to mention entering society, with each promotion, the strong will always stand out, attracting people like moths to a flame…

Principals only let capable teachers give public lessons, and capable students speak on stage. Companies only reward outstanding employees with bonuses and promotion to management. It’s the same principle.

People with ‘ability’ receive countless praises and envious looks, but they also bear countless responsibilities.

Like a perfect moral standard and spiritual idol living in others’ mouths, gradually, they don’t allow themselves to make mistakes, and once they do, everything might collapse.

Yu Luoyin was actually such a person.

From childhood to adulthood, he has been better than his peers, raised by his parents with the strictest and highest standards. He’s destined to be followed by others, destined to be the ‘child of others’, the ‘capable one’ perched on high.

He had to adapt to all of this, seemingly invincible, and he felt that he was such a person.

Yu Luoyin felt capable of handling all praise, but… what about criticism?

In fact, he was like a person living in another ‘ivory tower’. Once trust in his strength collapses, he becomes even more prone to trivialities.

Bai Xunyin understands Yu Luoyin.

Their bodies, with stiff arms, wrapped around each other’s waists, and they stood in front of the elevator like they had been acupunctured.

After who knows how long, Bai Xunyin slowly dragged herself in front of Yu Luoyin. Her hazel eyes lifted, staring directly into the man’s dim and unclear black eyes.

“I’m hungry,” the girl blinked, skillfully changing the subject.

“Let’s go have dumplings, Yu Luoyin.”

Yu Luoyin looked at her for a moment, his voice somewhat hoarse as he replied, “Okay.”

It felt like going back to the past.

In their senior year of high school when they ‘made up’.

During that time, though coated in a layer of false forgiveness, time truly was sweet.

Bai Xunyin liked eating dumplings, and after evening self-study, she often had him take her. Over time, this became Yu Luoyin’s favorite food.

Only when one likes something can it subtly change a man’s habits.

Although it was only two short months, Yu Luoyin still felt it was the best time.

Compared to him deceiving her, he preferred her deceiving him. Being deceived for a lifetime would be the best.

Yu Luoyin unconsciously drove the car to the old dumpling shop they used to frequent.

It was a well-known brand of Lin Lan’s, with a small door curtain and a good smell. Even late at night, it was bustling.

They waited for a while before getting two seats. Sitting in a narrow corner, when the boss came over to take their order, he actually remembered them.

“Young man, young lady, you’ve both grown up so much, haven’t you?”

Under the clear yellow light, the middle-aged woman’s face, softened by age, had fine wrinkles around her eyes.

She looked at them with surprise and said, “I remember, weren’t you both students from Third Middle High before? Always wearing the uniform from Third Middle High when you came to our place to eat dumplings, always rushing over here in the evening.”

“Yes…” Bai Xunyin was somewhat surprised, looking at the delighted shop owner in amazement.

“You still remember us?”

It’s been six years, and who would have thought that the owner of a small shop they often visited would still remember them? Even Yu Luoyin was somewhat astonished.

“Of course I remember! You two were so good-looking, so handsome,” the shop owner said with a smile, quite straightforwardly.

“I used to think that if you two kept coming to my shop to eat, my business wouldn’t need any decoration to shine. You two were in love back then, and you’re still together after so many years? What a strong relationship.”

Upon hearing this, the two at the narrow table exchanged a quiet glance, both unsure how to respond.

It felt like speaking about this might break the dreamy atmosphere.

There are many things in the world that are originally more ‘realistic’, so it’s better to leave some false beauty for strangers to imagine, which could be considered a good deed.

So Bai Xunyin just smiled and didn’t respond.

The shop owner happily went to make dumplings for the two of them.

She had a good memory and even remembered what flavors these two beautiful young people liked.

Yu Luoyin, according to his past preference, rolled a pair of disposable chopsticks, ensuring there were no small burrs on them before handing them to Bai Xunyin. He also wiped the spoon with a disinfectant tissue.

Bai Xunyin rested her chin on her fingertips, watching his ‘meticulous’ movements thoughtfully.

Soon, two bowls of dumplings were served. Through the steaming mist, Bai Xunyin saw that the area around Yu Luoyin’s fair eyes seemed a bit red.

She wasn’t sure if it was from the steam or… ‘Men do not easily shed tears, not until they reach the place of heartbreak.’

Bai Xunyin just thought about it and annoyingly muttered, “Yu Luoyin, are you going to cry?”

“Damn it,” Yu Luoyin’s slender fingers tapped on the table, slightly turned his head away, and concealed his irritation.

“I want to smoke.”

“No,” Bai Xunyin frowned, mercilessly refusing his request.

“You said you wouldn’t smoke in front of me.”

…

It was during their ‘first relationship’ in their senior year of high school, something he said to placate her.

At that time, he was such a scoundrel, saying all sorts of sweet nothings like they were free, making a bunch of promises that he didn’t know if he could keep.

No wonder Bai Xunyin hated him, detested him, and wouldn’t forgive him.

Yu Luoyin looked at the girl’s fair and delicate face, and smiled wryly.

“You still remember that?”

Bai Xunyin took a bite of the dumpling, and the hot soup burned her tongue, making her frown slightly as she exhaled a breath, vaguely saying, “I remember.”

“Rare,” Yu Luoyin smiled, his long thumb and forefinger fidgeting restlessly.

“You still remember the things I said when I was such a scoundrel.”

Bai Xunyin glanced at him, “So you’re not that shameless after all.”

…

How did this turn into suddenly scolding?

Looking at the somewhat bewildered man with clear eyes, the girl said seriously, “You even remember that you used to be a scoundrel.”

Heh, Yu Luoyin sighed helplessly, and with a slightly weary smile, he reluctantly smiled at her.

Although he didn’t want to admit it, he had to say it was true.

“So, can you be even more of a scoundrel now than you were before?”

Bai Xunyin stared at him through the thin mist, quietly asking, “Before, when you were a scoundrel, you were so arrogant. Yu Luoyin, who are you showing your decline to now?”

Yu Luoyin was taken aback.

“When I was in the north, many boys confessed to me, and I would occasionally think of you.”

This was the first time Bai Xunyin mentioned her past in front of Yu Luoyin. Although Yu Luoyin didn’t understand, he couldn’t help but greedily listen, wanting to know more about Bai Xunyin’s past.

He heard the girl’s soft voice saying, “Yu Luoyin, I hate you very much, but I can’t help comparing them to you. Is that despicable?”

Yu Luoyin felt like his throat was blocked, unable to say anything, only able to look at Bai Xunyin.

As she spoke these words, her face remained calm, eating dumplings without any change in expression, recounting her past inner turmoil.

“I hate you, and I hate myself for why I’m only attracted to guys like you. You changed my view of choosing a partner, but you can’t take responsibility. Yu Luoyin, you’re just a complete scoundrel.”

Yu Luoyin couldn’t help but smile, tacitly agreeing with Bai Xunyin’s words.

He was indeed a scoundrel, a villain; she was absolutely right.

“But this time I came back and met you again…” Bai Xunyin paused, changing the topic.

“But surprisingly, I feel like you’re not that much of a scoundrel anymore.”

Yu Luoyin couldn’t help but say, “What?”

“Maybe it’s because of your profession, your sense of responsibility towards patients. Later, I checked that you can’t enter the operating room after drinking, so I realized that you didn’t drink at the class reunion that night.”

Bai Xunyin smiled and continued, “It’s funny when you think about it. Compared to intentionally pretending to be drunk to deceive me this time, I’m more concerned about the fact that you, because of your profession, were disciplined enough not to drink at all.”

“Yinyin…”

“Let me finish,” Bai Xunyin raised her gaze to interrupt him, her hazel eyes staring at him with an indescribable emotion.

“Yu Luoyin, this makes me feel that you are much more mature than six years ago, and you take things more seriously. So, I find you more pleasing to the eye now.”

Sensing what Bai Xunyin was about to say, Yu Luoyin’s heart seemed to be gripped by invisible hands, and he looked at Bai Xunyin almost dazedly, his breath becoming somewhat labored.

“I’ll say it again, you’re much stronger now than six years ago.” Bai Xunyin withdrew her gaze, continuing to eat as if nothing had happened.

“Accidents and failures at the moment don’t matter. Back then, you were ignorant and fearless, but full of flamboyance. Don’t tell me you’ve progressed now but your thinking has regressed.”

Slowly understanding her implications, Yu Luoyin’s fingers curled involuntarily on his knees.

He watched as the woman bowed her head to eat dumplings, her pink earlobes steamed by the heat, and smiled thoughtfully—wasn’t she just trying to comfort him?

Was it necessary to beat around the bush like this?

But his lips couldn’t help but curl up crazily because he finally knew that Bai Xunyin still cared about him.

Regardless, she still cared about him.

“Yinyin…” Yu Luoyin couldn’t help but use that familiar term, his clear voice slightly hoarse.

“Thank you.”

“For many things, such as six years ago, or six years later, such as Bai Xunyin’s ability to ‘forgive and forget’ and comfort him, to mention a few. People change, six years are enough to transform a person’s thinking, so…”

Yu Luoyin stared at her, biting his tongue to swallow some ‘overstepping’ words, changing them to something else. “So if possible, I would like to apologize to the scoundrel I was six years ago, sincerely, just like you.”

“No need.”

Bai Xunyin swallowed the last sip of soup, looking at him seriously.

“I forgive you.”

This time, she really let it go.

“R-really?”

Yu Luoyin was stunned, his tongue even stumbled involuntarily.

He was hesitant because the young girl had said she forgave him before, but afterwards… they hadn’t seen each other for six years.

“Really.”

Bai Xunyin smiled, looking at Yu Luoyin, who was pretending to be calm, but was almost unable to conceal his joy. In between, she seemed to see the spirited teenager from six years ago.

Gentlemanly, scoundrelly, refined, charming… but he had always been the only boy who could make her heart flutter over the years.

In the cozy and familiar atmosphere, amidst the bustling noise of the surroundings, Bai Xunyin suddenly felt that she didn’t want to compete with him anymore.

“Yu Luoyin.”

She paused and said quietly, “Let’s be together.”

She still liked him, liked him very much, so she didn’t want to make things difficult for herself.

Saying this wasn’t for Yu Luoyin, but for herself.

The youth who was once the pride of the heavens six years ago, despite being detestable, had always been her ‘dream’.

Bai Xunyin yearned for him, wanted to possess him.

The reason she chose to say it today, at this moment, was because she suddenly realized—life never knows which comes faster, ‘accident’ or ‘tomorrow’.

So, while she could grasp it, while she could have it, Bai Xunyin wanted to be kind to herself a little bit more.