Never Marry a Man With Two Tintins

Chapter 28

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Chapter 28

Cheng Nuo's legs were caught by the doll whose grip was like iron. His face turned red and he tried to struggle but this only made the doll 's grip tighten until it felt as though his bones might break. The pain was almost enough to make him faint.

Liu Guang tried to give chase but Li Yue waved his hands and more silk threads flew towards Liu Guang. Liu Guang was careless and his wrist was cut again. The silk threads cut deep into his flesh, making his blood pour out in a torrent. Little Seven was like a black shadow, constantly flying through the air to block or attack Liu Guang. Liu Guang gritted his teeth and his eyes were as sharp as an eagle.

The corners of Li Yue's lips turned up ever so slightly as he commanded Little Five to bring Cheng Nuo over to him. Taking out a golden needle, Li Yue thrust it into Cheng Nuo's waist. Cheng Nuo was suddenly unable to move as he lay there upright. From his current position, he couldn't see what was happening below. All he could do was listen to the sounds of fighting, which made him worry about Liu Guang even more.

"Don’t worry, I won't allow you to feel any pain. Don't be afraid." Li Yue stretched his fingers and gently stroked Cheng Nuo’s eyelids. Looking carefully at Cheng Nuo's eyes, he praised him: "I've taken two pairs of rare black eyes before but none of them are as beautiful as these."

All of Cheng Nuo's senses were still functioning so when this happened all of the hair on his body tried to stand on end. ****! He had heard about face-mania, voice-mania, baby-mania, and various other manias too numerous to count, but who had ever heard of a pervert with an eye-mania?! He obviously has the most common eye color on Earth, okay?!

Now that his head was on the chopping block, of course, he dared not curse like he did before. Now he smiled stiffly and said in a soft voice: "Can you tell me what you want to do with the doll that you will use my eyes on?"

Li Yue was slightly surprised. He liked to tease his prey. What he liked most was when they were trembling with fear as he held them in the palm of his hand. Cheng Nuo's attitude was a first for him.

He started calculating using his fingers, looking innocent: "Well, Little Five is an earth elemental doll. Little Seven is a combat doll, and the others have their different roles… come to think about it, if it's you then I can only use your eyes to make a Little Nine doll to play with me."

Cheng Nuo breathed a sigh of relief and smiled: "Dolls can play with you, but can they make your bed and fold your quilt? Can they cook for you? Can they talk to you and tell you stories?"

Li Yue smiled and his purple eyes narrowed: "So what do you mean?"

"It’s very simple. As long as you let my brother go, I’ll accompany you like one of your dolls. I'll be very useful and I can do everything I just said. Do you remember earlier when I made up that puzzle about measuring water? I know many other brain teasers. Isn't that much more fun than playing with a doll?" Cheng Nuo looked at Li Yue sincerely. Remembering the way Bai Zhi liked to be addressed, he decided to pretend to be obedient and shamelessly added, "Master."

Perverts should have the same tastes, right? It cost nothing to pretend to call him that now. Later, he'll wait for a chance to deal with that ****er!

Liu Guang’s ears were much more sensitive than ordinary people's. Naturally, he heard every word. He shouted angrily, "Cheng Nuo, what are you talking about?"

He was so anxious that he cut off Little Seven's long halberd, along with seven or eight silk threads. The cuts on his wrist started bleeding even faster.

Li Yue nodded and whispered: "It seems that the name you gave earlier is a fake. Your idea is very good, but dolls, unlike people, do not betray or deceive people."

Having said his piece, Li Yue took out a set of refined-looking instruments from his storage bag. There were scalpels, pliers, bottles filled with liquid medicine, and so on.

When the cold cotton ball touched his face, Cheng Nuo was really frightened. Who wouldn't be afraid of having his eyes dug out? It was scarier than encountering a monster. "I'm too scared now," he said, trembling. "I'm afraid my eyes won't look good if you take them now."

Li Yue said softly, "Don’t be afraid. In a moment you'll smell a wonderful fragrance and then you'll only think about your most pleasurable memories. Your eyes will look very beautiful. Rest assured, when you wake up, everything will be fine."

His face was as a pretty as a girl's and his voice was warm and pleasant-sounding but Cheng Nuo thought he was more frightening than a demon. Cheng Nuo's back was covered in cold sweat.

Liu Guang saw that the situation was critical and his eyes were almost spitting fire. He yelled loudly: "Li Yue, if you dare harm a hair on his head, I'll tear you into tiny pieces!"

Li Yue laughed and said, "You should worry about yourself. You're half-dead." He retrieved Little Seven that had been cut in half, then added a double layer of silk thread in front of him. Liu Guang, although his attacks were fierce, was worried that by the time he finished cutting all of the threads, Cheng Nuo's eyes would already be in a jade box.

Li Yue did not dare to sacrifice any more dolls. Those dolls all contained his heart's blood which allowed him to manipulate them freely. Just now, Little Nine and Little Seven were both cut. Even though he laughed and spoke as though nothing had happened, in fact, a fourth or a third of his energy had been damaged.

Without further hesitation, he approached Cheng Nuo with a scalpel in one hand and a bottle filled with the fragrance of euphoria in the other.

Liu Guang gave a panicked scream. Waving his short sword, he moved forward quickly until his whole body was covered in blood and ripped pieces of his clothes hung from his body.

Li Yue shook his head and said, "Stupid! You're courting death so don't blame me."

Although Cheng Nuo couldn't see what was happening, he knew that with Liu Guang's temperament, he was likely to do something stupid so he cried: "Liu Guang, stop! It's just my eyes! I'm not afraid of this ****er!" Even though he wanted to appear calm and fearless, the way his voice shook betrayed his fear.

He took a deep breath and yelled: "I, your father, can live even without eyes! Would you despise me if I was blind? Li Yue, I'll give you my eyes but this kid's wolf-like eyes aren't fun. You should leave those alone."

"Humans really like to speak empty words even when trembling all over." Li Yue sighed. "But dolls don't lie. I want two pairs of eyes."

Cheng Nuo angrily interrupted him: "Haha, no wonder you can do this type of beastly thing! It's because you don't consider yourself a human! Xiao Guang, stop!"

Li Yue reached out and slapped Cheng Nuo. His purple eyes were cold. "If you scold me again, I’ll cut off your tongue first."

Liu Guang’s face had turned pale because he had lost too much blood. He started panting. The two people's words seemed to spin and roar in his ears, as though countless wheels were turning inside his head. They weren't far from him at all but he couldn't reach them.

He watched Cheng Nuo being beaten, distraught. In his heart, countless voices were saying, "You're too weak!"

Thinking of how those bright and gentle eyes would no longer be able to look at him in the future, the pain his heart was a hundred times more painful than his body's agony. No, it was thousands of times more painful.

Liu Guang's head ached and he could hardly breathe. With his head in his hands, he roared. The sound was deafening and wind blasted away from his body, making the branches of the trees surrounding him rustle as they shook wildly.

Both Li Yue and Cheng Nuo were shocked. Cheng Nuo heard the movement and exclaimed, "Xiao Guang!" in spite of the burning pain on his face.

Li Yue covered his ears and waited for the beast-like cry to stop. He was shocked to find that the little kid below seemed to have changed completely.

Liu Guang’s eyes have turned completely into a deep, dark green color. Red hair flowed down to his waist, two small fangs jutted from his mouth, and his ears were now pointed up like a canine's. He stared at Li Yue with glazed but ferocious eyes; his back arched as though he was a beast watching his prey.

Li Yue suddenly remembered a passage he had read from an ancient book and burst into a cold sweat. This was – a descendant of the ancients!

According to legend, the ten martial gods who founded the civilizations on this continent were ancients. Their bodies contained the blood of the mythical creatures who had been alive during the creation of the world. Their most striking feature was they could change partway into beasts when they were enraged. That was recorded in the ancient history books. Regarding what the true descendants of the ancients look like, no one knows because, in the end, no one had ever seen one or even believed that one existed. But how else could he explain the changes in this person in front of him?

Liu Guang has already begun to move without conscious thought. He simply moved based on the urging of his heart – to tear this person in front of him into pieces!

He dropped the short sword he was holding and used his sharp claws to tear cut the silk thread. It was as easy as tearing paper apart. Then, fast as lightning, he leaped towards Li Yue. The branch Li Yue was on was 16 to 19 meters high but Liu Guang simply bent his knees and sprang up. He grabbed the branch with his hands then flipped his body over.

The gust of wind was enough to steal Li Yue's breath away. Stunned, he quickly moved to dodge, putting distance between the two of them. Liu Guang threw himself into empty air. A low growl emerged from his throat. Landing on a branch, he caught up to Li Yue, grabbed his foot, then threw him to the ground.

The thick tree branch started shaking but Cheng Nuo was still paralyzed. His body fell and he couldn't help but scream.

Liu Guang had landed with his feet on Li Yue's chest. Li Yue's chest and stomach were injured. He immediately coughed up blood and felt as though his ribs had been broken. He quickly sacrificed the toughest of his human skin dolls, Little Four, but it was still punctured by Liu Guang's claws. His heart's blood was damaged again, making him cough up another mouthful of blood. His vision turned black and he almost fainted. He was hanging on by a thread.

Liu Guang’s claws were buried deep in Li Yue’s flesh. His shoulder was dislocated and dripping with blood. Then he bowed his head and opened his mouth like a beast. He wanted to tear this man to pieces!

Right at that moment, a familiar voice reached Liu Guang's sharp ears. He turned around, confused. He was puzzled about what that falling object was. In his eyes, he could clearly see that thing that seemed to be falling in slow motion. Finally, he saw that person's face and a voice in his heart said: "You can't let him fall."

He gave his prey a longing look but turned around and sped up. One hand caught Cheng Nuo while the other hand tore the remaining silk thread from the air. It was as if there was a voice in the darkness telling him that those things would hurt this person in his arms.

Cheng Nuo looked at Liu Guang in stunned amazement, suddenly dumbfounded. Was this… Liu Guang?

Cheng Nuo's body was still numb and unable to move much but he could move his eyes. Seeing Li Yue's tragic situation, he was shocked. How did Liu Guang transform into this demonic-looking appearance and become so powerful?

Those lifeless-looking dark green eyes were on Cheng Nuo as if confirming something. Cheng Nuo was dismayed and said hesitantly: "Xiao Guang, what’s wrong with you?"

Like a stone dropped into a still pond, creating thousands of ripples, Liu Guang's body began to shake. His ears and hair suddenly turned back into their original appearance and his eyes slowly regained their usual bright green color.

Cheng Nuo's mouth fell open in amazement at this strange process. Teetering back and forth on the brink of life and death, his nerves were frayed.

Liu Guang staggered as he held Cheng Nuo because of his excessive blood loss and the aftereffect of fatigue after his transformation. Finally, he couldn't help but fall to the ground, still holding onto Cheng Nuo.



By the way, most casual readers don't have to read the translation notes. They are interesting if you want to learn about Chinese idioms but you can totally skip these notes if you want to.

  • "Dolls, unlike people, do not betray or deceive people." – 阴奉阳违 (yīn fèng yáng wéi) – literally something like "yin – accept orders – yang – disobey orders." It's basically an idiom about two-faced people who, on the surface, pretend to be obedient but disobey orders behind their superior's back.
  • "He yelled loudly…" – 开锣喝道 (kāi luó hè dào) – meaning: to clear a street by banging gongs and shouting loudly.
  • "Xiao Guang, stop!" – Actually, during the time Cheng Nuo is trying to act tough when he was captured, he kept using 老子 (lǎozǐ) which is an arrogant version of "I." It's literally "father," "daddy," or "I, your father." It sounded too weird so I omitted it.
  • "The branch Li Yue was on was 16 to 19 meters high." – 五六丈 – The original said 5-6 zhang, an ancient unit of measurement. I found a Zhang Conversion Chart. That's apparently approximately 19 meters or 63 feet.
  • "His eyes slowly regained their usual bright green color." – 湖绿色 hú lǜ sè – lake green color

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