Regressor Instruction Manual

Chapter 1470. Continental War (50)

‘If only I[1] had been just a little stronger...’

“...”

‘What if I had been just a little more useful? What if I had been smart and decisive like Paint, steady and well-versed in magic like Palette, strong and cool like Pastel?’

“...”

‘If only... if only I had just a little more courage.’

It was a thought that would circle endlessly in my head every night as I fell asleep and whenever I woke up from a nightmare. Even now, whenever I close my eyes, the scene from that day would brush past my mind.

I remembered trembling like an aspen tree before a demon that looked so overwhelmingly powerful, and I remembered Lady Peneloti throwing herself toward it.

I often shouted "revolution," yet that day, I couldn't do anything. I could barely even stand, and I remembered wanting to run away at any moment. Even though I knew that if Peneloti were to go there, we'd lose her, I still couldn’t do anything.

I even faintly remember wishing that she would go there. I thought that if it were Peneloti, she'd show us some kind of miracle. I thought she'd somehow stop the enormous thing right in front of us.

Aina Peneloti was that kind of person. Unlike me, who only talked, she could walk the talk, and she was always shining. Yes, there was probably no one who suited the word "revolution" better than her.

She was always confident, always standing tall, always beautiful, like a flower blooming proudly from the ground—she was that sort of person. At some point, I found myself admiring her so much that I felt like I would even sell my soul if it meant resembling her even a little or getting closer to her.

And so the young noble lady once called Lady Brush chased after Aina Peneloti in her own way. Gathering my courage, I followed behind her, and together, we shone at the debutante ball. Perhaps that was my first step. In the end, it amounted to nothing, and I couldn’t do anything, but still, I moved forward with her.

It didn’t stop there.

After she died, I resolved to help those in need. I decided to fight for the victims of war and for the innocent people suffering in pain. I decided to fight for the things I believed had value. Even though I was no longer a noble, I practiced noblesse oblige, holding onto the pride of a noble lady, and lived my life helping those I could.

Even so, Aina Peneloti always seemed like she was moving farther and farther away from me.

“...”

On the contrary, the boy named Jin Yoo, who tried to stop the war, could easily stand closer to her, as I was always afraid to take the final step at the very end. Even when there was something I wanted to do or something I had to do, failing to muster the last bit of courage and making excuses in the end had become like a habit for me.

Because it was dangerous...

Because the situation did not allow it...

Because it made no sense...

Because it was impossible...

They were the excuses that always blocked my way. Even though I knew that a revolution would never happen unless someone stepped forward, I always hid in the shadow of excuses.

While I was merely daydreaming that it would be nice if the war could be stopped, someone else had resolved to stop it themselves and raised a sword. That was the boy named Jin Yoo.

While I was praying for that demon to disappear, someone else saved the world even at the cost of their own life. That was Aina Peneloti. It was the same in the battle where all the young ladies fought together. The person called Brush was always so terribly weak.

‘What are you doing right now? You’re just being a burden.’

“...”

‘Why couldn’t you reach out your hand? It was close enough. You could’ve done it.’

“...”

“Fall back! Lady Brush!”

“...”

‘R-right... I’m not used to fighting. Maybe supporting from behind is helping too.’

“...”

‘Paint knows I’m inexperienced in combat. That’s why she placed me as a rearguard. I should trust Paint’s judgment. If I rush in for no reason, I’ll only get in the others’ way.’

I had begun to rationalize myself.

‘This is pathetic... Brush, you...’

Even when Paint was in danger...

"You have to move, Brush. You have to move! Even if you die in her place, you have to stop it! If we lose Paint, we’re finished."

Even when Pastel suddenly appeared and saved Paint.

‘Pastel came. It’s fine now. It’s fine. Pastel came. Pastel...’

I did nothing and simply watched the situation unfold.

When Peneloti’s voice suddenly rang out...

[Ladies! Let us shine our light together!]

My tears unknowingly fell. It wasn’t because something miraculous had happened. It was hard to explain in detail, but it was probably because of an equal parts mixture of self-loathing and self-contempt. The shame that I still hadn’t changed at all, along with the belief and relief that Peneloti would save us, were all tangled together.

Even though I had been chasing after her all this time and had come this far, I realized that I was still hoping for Aina Peneloti’s help. No, I was still receiving it, and I was still waiting for it. I realized that nothing had changed since then.

“Heuuuuk... Peneloti...”

“Heuuuk...”

“What’s going on? Why are you suddenly bawling? Ah! Did you finally realize you’re about to die? Getting a sense of who you messed with?”

“...”

“...”

“Not at all. It’s hard to explain, but... it seems an old friend has been watching over us.”

“...”

“...”

“What nonsense are they spouting over there? More importantly, Hee-Young, could you hurry and treat my wounds? It hurts.”

“...”

“Quit joking around and hurry up and get those idiots who died so stupidly back on their feet, too.”

“...”

“Hoo... where on earth is the captain and what is he doing...”

All the other ladies reorganized the formation. The situation was obviously the worst possible. We had no idea where to even begin untangling this mess, yet smiles lingered on everyone’s lips. Even while sobbing their eyes out, they stubbornly kept casting their spells.

Pastel wore an expression like someone who had just been saved, and Paint’s tears blurred her vision so badly that it was hard to believe she could even see. Even Palette, who rarely cried, kept rubbing her eyes. Hamgardia, Rainelpia, Rusvilla, everyone was breaking down at the sound of Peneloti’s voice.

Perhaps I was the only one feeling relieved. Perhaps I was the only one finding psychological comfort in the fact that Peneloti was with us. Perhaps I was the only one feeling reassured that I didn’t have to take that frightening, terrifying final step, that last step forward.

Wasn’t it strange that I wasn't disgusted with myself for feeling that way?

‘What... am I even doing...’

“Come on, you bastards!”

“Pastel is the same as ever.”

“Paint, are you going to be okay?”

“Y-yes... O-of course.”

‘Why am I... always...’

[Still...]

‘Peneloti...’

[Lady Brush, you’ve been pressing forward all this time.]

‘I-I really have so much I want to say...’

[...]

‘If I ever met you again, there were so many things I wanted to tell you... I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Peneloti. I’m so sorry for being this stupid and weak... I’m sorry that nothing has changed... I’m sorry that I’m still a useless fool who can’t help with anything.’

[...]

“I-I... Peneloti...”

[You don’t need to think about anything else, Lady Brush. You yourself are already an incredibly wonderful and admirable person, just as you are. You've always been stepping forward. You've always been walking forward in your own way and with the strength that only you possess. It’s just...]

“...”

[I just think that you simply haven’t reached your destination yet, Lady Brush. Or perhaps... you're already long. Life is long, after all, isn’t it? Look at what you have created with the footprints you’ve left behind.]

“...”

“...”

[Try to remember how many people you’ve helped, Lady Brush, and how many people you saved.]

“...”

“...”

[Open your eyes wide and look at what’s right in front of you.]

“...”

“...”

I knew better than anyone that this wasn’t a moment where I could afford to be comforted.

“Heuk... heuuuk...”

I knew full well that there was nothing more foolish than getting lost in my emotions at a time like this. And yet, I realized that I desperately needed someone’s comfort. Perhaps I had been waiting all along for someone to tell me that I was doing well, that I was holding on. The others were probably no different. Of course, they weren’t exactly like me, but Peneloti was surely offering comfort to everyone at this very moment.

I could hear Lady Pastel muttering constantly.

“Yeah... yeah... Peneloti...”

“Yeah, I love you too. I-I love you too... heuuuk... I-I’ll love you until the day I die, Peneloti.”

She kept nodding, wiping away her tears, all while clashing with the Murder Brigade.

I also noticed Paint, murmuring, “I’m sorry. I’m sorry... Lady Peneloti. I-I...”

Even as she summoned cards of light, she kept communicating with Peneloti. It looked like she was apologizing, and Lady Peneloti seemed to be understanding with her.

Palette looked as though she were chatting with an old friend she hadn’t seen in years, and with Rainelpia, it felt like she was talking about the wounds on her body. It was the same with Hamgardia. All of the ladies were speaking with her.

The strange thing was that even in the middle of all that, we were still pushing back the Murder Brigade. The enemies were by no means weak. Those we thought we had already killed rose again as corpses, displaying the same abilities as before, and the others’ attacks were fierce enough to be terrifying.

Even when we kept injuring them, they healed in an instant thanks to a dark aura, and the battle was dragging on into a prolonged fight. Despite all that, every lady combined their strength and drove them back, even though we were accumulating a lot of wounds, and even though we had utterly exhausted ourselves to the point of collapsing.

Even to someone like me, who was practically a novice at combat, it was a truly astonishing sight.

[Look, Lady Brush.]

“...”

“...”

[If it weren’t for you, Lady Brush, it would’ve been difficult for everyone to come together.]

“Heuuuk... heuk...”

[I’m especially grateful to you, Lady Brush.]

“Heuk... heuuuuuuung...”

[Now...]

“Peneloti... Lady Peneloti... I...”

[How about we head to the next destination together?]

“What do you mean...”

[Revolutionarily!]

I just nodded frantically.

“Yeah... r-revolutionarily... Yeah! Revolutionarily!”

[Okay! Hold my hand and let’s walk together!]

“...”

[Take a step forward.]

“O-okay... Okay, Peneloti.”

[One.]

“O-one.”

[Two!]

“Two.”

[Three!]

“Th-three!”

The moment I absentmindedly took one more step forward, a bright light wrapped around me. A small pillar of light descended from the sky. Without realizing it, I reached out my hand toward it, and the wounds of my friends fighting ahead of me began to heal.

Everyone stared at me with blank faces, including the enemies.

Just as I was feeling flustered by what I had done, I heard a voice.

[You have been forcibly advanced to an Epic-rank class, Devotee of the Black Rose.]

1. Lady Brush’s POV ☜