Read Novel Full Chapter 1226: I Don’t Know. (1)
Chapter 1226: I Don’t Know. (1)
Baek Cheon bit his lip quietly.
Was this an unexpected part? No way.
He had certainly thought about it. That the people of Southern Lands under Four Sects Alliance would suffer. And that that suffering would be harsher than anyone imagined.
But thinking does not equal understanding, and understanding does not carry the same weight as lived experience.
Until he saw their lives with his own eyes and felt on his skin what they thought as they lived, all these words remained vague and hollow in his mind.
But now he knew.
What had been casually summed up as a single word, ‘hardship,’ for Baek Cheon or someone else, was a tangible threat to those who experienced it, a terror that forced them to crush their own feelings and bow their heads in abasement.
Im So-Byeong glanced at Baek Cheon’s expression and shrugged.
“Of course, it’s not the Acting Sect leader’s fault...”
“No.”
Baek Cheon shook his head with a bitter expression.
“It’s not because I am Mount Hua’s Acting Sect leader. I prided myself on taking up the sword for the common people, yet I failed to understand what kind of lives they actually live; that is clearly my fault.”
“...Why do you always come to that conclusion?”
Im So-Byeong awkwardly scratched his head.
He had only wanted to inform him because Baek Cheon seemed unaware of the reality the people of Southern Lands were facing, but it had ended up looking like he was lecturing Baek Cheon, which was embarrassing.
“I know I’m not really in a position to say this, so please don’t think I’m being presumptuous...”
Baek Cheon smiled faintly, as if aware of that sentiment.
“Don’t worry. Didn’t Confucius also take a child as his teacher and learn diligently? He did not learn from the child because he was inferior to him.”
“Oh. Have you read the Three Character Classic?”
Im So-Byeong brightened momentarily. Hearing a Confucian anecdote come from the mouths of these ignorant Mount Hua men was strange and pleasing.
Baek Cheon smiled and nodded.
“If Confucius could learn from a child, why could I not learn from a bandit?”
“Well, hey, you?”
The Green Forest King bristled to curse, but Baek Cheon abruptly turned his head and looked at Hyung Euk.
“I’m sorry.”
When he suddenly bowed his head, Hyung Euk startled and hurriedly stopped him.
“W-warrior! Why are you like this all of a sudden? What kind of wrongdoing have you done...?”
Baek Cheon did not list each mistake he had made; it was pointless. Instead, he conveyed a single vow.
“It won’t be long.”
“...”
“The rule of Four Sects Alliance has fundamental limits. No matter how long the night, dawn eventually comes.”
It was also a promise he made to himself.
“I will strive to bring that dawn even a little sooner.”
Then Hyung Euk answered with a bright smile.
“Thank you! Truly, thank you, warrior!”
“Yes. We will try harder. So please do not abandon hope.”
Baek Cheon tried in every way to convey his resolve to Hyung Euk. But then—
“Tsk.”
Im So-Byeong’s indifferent click of the tongue cut off Baek Cheon’s words.
He turned his head in surprise, but Im So-Byeong’s gaze was no longer on Baek Cheon. Staring fixedly at Hyung Euk, Im So-Byeong spoke nonchalantly.
“You seem to have misunderstood.”
“...Yes?”
“I wouldn’t be that kind of man, but this straightforward man before you isn’t one to pretend not to see when offended or when the odds are wrong. Isn’t it obvious from his face?”
“...”
“So stop trying to flatter and speak your true mind. That will be far more helpful. He’s more remarkable than you think.”
Hyung Euk stammered with a slightly flustered face.
“I-I don’t know what you mean. I’m just telling it as it is...”
“Who knows? If you lay out your true feelings, this situation might improve even a day sooner.”
Hyung Euk glanced subtly at Baek Cheon. Hesitant, he peered toward the door. Watching those busily serving food for a long moment, his expression turned suddenly complex and subtle.
Noticing something, Baek Cheon opened his mouth with a stern face.
“I ask you, please.”
“...Yes?”
“I’m not looking merely for the feeling of having helped someone. To walk the right path, it’s important I know the facts as they are. So... please. Tell me your inner thoughts plainly.”
“Ah, no. My true feelings...”
“Please.”
Baek Cheon bowed deeply. Startled, Hyung Euk hastily grabbed his shoulder to steady him.
By then Jo Gul, Yoon Jong, Namgung Do-Wei, and even Tang Pae, who had arrived, watched the scene and dared not enter the house, only looking on cautiously.
“...If I were to speak my true feelings...”
Muttering, Hyung Euk let out a deep sigh.
“Warrior.”
“Yes.”
“...Please don’t take it the wrong way. You seem like a truly good person, so a lowly wretch like me dares to vent even a little...”
“It won’t upset me at all.”
“Then...”
With a face still torn, Hyung Euk hesitated for a moment, squeezed his eyes shut, and spoke.
“How are we supposed to trust you?”
“...Sorry?”
“How are we to believe your words, warrior?”
The words from his mouth struck Baek Cheon hard. This was a different kind of shock from what he’d felt until now.
Baek Cheon stared at Hyung Euk in a daze for a moment, then spoke.
“I know I don’t inspire trust, but...”
“No. That’s not it, warrior. It’s not that we don’t trust you.”
Hyung Euk shook his head, then sighed deeply again.
“Warrior... do you know how many times we’ve heard such words?”
Baek Cheon couldn’t bring himself to answer.
“Everyone says it. We’re the ones who will help you, we truly care about you.”
A wan smile creased Hyung Euk’s mouth.
“Those who set up the military, and those who come from the authorities, all say the same. It’s a kind and grateful thing, but... then why are we always in this state?”
“...”
“Where are those who say they think of us? Why... why do they speak so when life is relatively good, yet vanish when life becomes truly hard?”
Hyung Euk asked in a hollow voice.
“You told us not to abandon hope, didn’t you?”
“...Yes.”
“Warrior... that thing called hope only torments people. Every time we heard comforting words we held on to hope. But when that hope becomes disappointment, we always think: it would have been better not to hope. If we’d just accepted that this is how things are, it would have been less painful.”
“...”
“Didn’t we have expectations from the start? We believed. Naively and utterly. But then the world became like this, and those who told us to believe just stand over on the other side of the river and watch.”
Baek Cheon clenched his fist. What pained him most was Hyung Euk’s expression, as if he’d already given up everything.
“You tell us to endure and wait. But... for simple folk like us it’s incomprehensible. Why must we wait? Why do those illustrious and mighty people just watch those villains? Why won’t those who say they care for us fight them on our behalf?”
“...”
“We shared our meager means to offer help and did everything we could to be of some help, but when things actually happen, everyone withdraws and acts like it’s none of their concern...”
“That’s...”
Baek Cheon opened his mouth to reply, but Hyung Euk answered what he was about to say.
“Yes, we understand. Hastily saving a few might jeopardize the greater plan. How could ignorant folk like us presume to guess the deep thoughts of those above?”
“...”
“But... but, warrior.”
Hyung Euk’s gaze fell on his father, who had lost consciousness.
“It’s strange. People like you always tell us this: people like us are the most important. You took up the sword for people like us. Right?”
“...Yes.”
“Then... why is it always us who are last to save when trouble arises? Why are we always the ones who can be saved last?”
Hyung Euk’s voice grew louder and louder.
“Why are we people who can die and be allowed to suffer? Why must we beg like vermin, endure every humiliation, and be grateful if only our lives are left at the end?”
“...”
“Why are we, why! Why must we cry with gratitude at those small acts of charity tossed to us, and then tremble worrying about the aftermath? Why?”
Faced with the swelling voice, Baek Cheon bit his lip hard.
“You told us to have hope, didn’t you?”
“...”
“We’re not blaming you, warrior. If it weren’t for you, none of us would still be alive. Thank you truly. We’re not unscrupulous thieves who, after being saved from the water, covet the rescuer’s bundle. Resenting you for this situation would be wrong.”
Hyung Euk quietly shook his head.
“But... but, warrior. Because of this gratitude, to take up hope again—what we’ve seen... and what we’ve endured is too much. It’s... yes, it’s too harsh a thing to ask. It’s too heavy to even hold hope...”
Baek Cheon closed his eyes quietly.
How complacent those words had sounded to someone who had to call even his own father a useless old man to survive or ◆ Nоvеlіgһt ◆ (Only on Nоvеlіgһt) to save others.
He had thought he understood, but he did not; thought he knew, but he did not.
Baek Cheon spoke with difficulty. Not because he had much to say, but because he felt he had to say something.
“I... only wanted to offer a little comfort, but my thinking was short-sighted. I’m sorry.”
“Ah, no. That’s not what I meant.”
“But not everyone is so irresponsible. Not everyone thinks that way. Please at least know that.”
Hearing that, Hyung Euk’s expression hardened slightly. Biting his lip, he finally couldn’t hold back and spoke.
“Warrior.”
“Yes.”
“You’re on your way somewhere in a hurry to save someone right now, aren’t you?”
“...”
“And that’s surely an important task. Isn’t it?”
Baek Cheon’s face hardened.
“So you’ll be leaving soon. You’ve done what you needed to do here.”
He had realized too what Hyung Euk was about to say.
“I don’t know. You seem to think we can be rescued later, that this much help is enough and that more important people exist elsewhere... everyone thinks like that... we are treated as if it’s acceptable for a few of us to die in the meantime.”
“...”
“What are we supposed to believe in and hope for...? I... I really don’t know.”
It felt like falling into an endless abyss.