The Innkeeper

Chapter 2195: Two mindsets

Lex closed his eyes and squeezed the bridge of his nose as he thought of a way to deal with the situation. The problem was that he could see Liz’s fluctuating emotions as well. There was reluctance, but there was also intrigue.

He was not in the right mental state to deal with this issue. It was difficult to focus on any one thing at a given time when he was already doing so many other things across all his consciousnesses. He suddenly wondered if his Karmic Clone could drink coffee.

"This is not the place to have this conversation," Lex said with his exhaustion abundantly clear in his voice, and teleported the three of them to a cabin on Midnight Mountain - one of his favorite go-to spots. He sat down in a chair and forced himself to stop furrowing as he looked from Levi to Liz.

Although Liz said nothing, and he could see she felt guilty for even considering wanting to leave, he could not ignore what she wanted. He wanted to protect her, yes, but he was not her jailer. Life had to be lived regardless of risks. He just preferred that the risks taken be calculated risks rather than blind ones.

"Alright, Levi, you go first," said Lex. "I’m... willing to hear you out, but you better be convincing."

Levi could not help but feel tremendous pressure facing Lex, and it wasn’t because of how strong he was. Sitting in front of him, she felt like a young child who was caught doing something wrong. Well, wanting to invite his sister into an incredibly dangerous realm technically constituted as doing something wrong.

"There... there isn’t much to say beyond what I’ve already said," she explained once she overcame that hint of intimidation. "The return of the Dream realm has broken a delicate balance. The universe has entered a state of chaos, whereas previously chaos and order were in a balance. This is something that the Tower of Providence works very hard to prevent.

"For this reason, many dormant agents of the tower have been activated, and the Tower of Providence has entered a period of heightened activity. It has even gone as far as tapping onto older members of the Path of Order who have completed missions from the tower before.

"For me, specifically, the tower passed orders to go to the Innkeeper and request access to the Dream realm, and carry out my mission once I enter the realm. However, in a rare occurrence, my mission received an update. I was instructed to invite Liz as well. While her reason for being invited has not been made clear to me, I have been informed that she can play a significant role in resolving the situation.

"The Tower of Providence does not have a reputation for exaggeration. It, alone, manages all the powers and races in the entire universe that align to the Path of Order. The number of Dao Lords in its control, or at least in its sphere of influence cannot be easily calculated. For it to claim that she can have a significant impact, the tower must have its reasons."

Lex pursed his lips. His understanding of the Tower of Providence was at the surface level. If it had any secrets, he did not know. However, he could not claim that he had a bad impression of it.

In fact, both Lex and Jack could trace many of their most core accomplishments all the way back to the Tower of Providence itself! For Lex, the tower was how he got his hands of Taro’ fertilizer. For Jack it was how he ended up in the Folklore realm, and how he ended up recruiting Bob into his crew.

Moreover, the purpose of the tower always seemed to be to help others. It was difficult to have a bad impression of the tower. Yet, Lex could not help but feel slightly sceptical when it came to the tower targeting his sister. It wasn’t because he had doubts about the tower, but because he found it hard to believe that there could really be an entity without ulterior motives in this universe.

But, Lex forced himself to stop thinking like that. There was nothing in the universe he couldn’t be suspicious of without evidence if he began to nurture such a mindset.

He turned to look towards Liz. The seals he put on her were still intact. If she had relied on her fusion state between herself and Nemo, then breaking through the seals would not be an issue at all. However she had retained her seals, keeping herself in the mortal realms.

Even so, simply because she was fused with Nemo, the passing years did not seem to age or weaken her. Instead, she continued to grow stronger.

It was a fact, however, that she had never used her strength to overcome a challenge since she had obtained it - not truly.

"What about you? Tell me your true thoughts," said Lex softly, making sure to leave any sense of intimidation out of it. "There’s no need to force yourself. It is, after all, your own life."

Hearing Lex’s words, Liz felt even more guilty for some reason.

"It’s nothing. I just... lately I’ve just been thinking about what it is I’m doing with my life," Liz confessed, even if that ’lately’ began merely a few minutes ago. "What is it that I’m even cultivating for? I used to cultivate to grow stronger so I could be safer. That’s still there but... it just feels like I’m living for the sake of living.

"Honestly, having such thoughts feels silly to me. I haven’t figured it out yet. It’s just that hearing Levi talk about helping restore order, I felt like maybe... I’ll find another purpose in helping others."

Lex sighed. Stupid humans and their stupid need for purpose and fulfillment. What’s wrong with living a nice, relaxing but meaningless life? Although he thought that, his own life absolutely did not adhere to that mindset at all. After all, he was constantly putting himself in the most dangerous situations because he didn’t want to endanger others, and because he wanted to protect them.

"Liz, I have two, conflicting mindsets, both of which I try to live by," Lex said as he leaned back in his chair. "Making sense of how I can have conflicting mindsets is not something I try to do anymore, because the universe itself does not adhere to our feeble sense of logical thinking. Besides, humans are emotional beings to begin with, so there’s no need to be too logical."

He paused for a moment after saying that, as if gathering his thoughts, and giving Liz some time to understand what he was saying.

"On one hand, I’ve been living life thinking about what I want. You know, back on Earth, they’ve always encouraged following what you feel like doing, because it’s your life. It’s a pretty decent way of living, since it’s also a message on avoiding toxic influences in life that keep you trapped.

"But, that kind of mentality doesn’t resonate too strongly with me, actually. I want to live life on my own terms. But at the same time, I don’t mind making some sacrifices, and enduring a bit of additional burden, if it helps those I care about. I think... one of the best things about the relationship among those who work at the Inn is that we’re always looking out for each other. Everyone helps in their own ways, however they can help, and that creates an incredible sense of community that cannot be replaced."

Lex paused again, though this time his gaze focused on Liz.

"Endruing a little hardship, a bit of distress actually feels entirely worth it if you end up helping someone you care about. I wouldn’t go and pick up endless burdens for random strangers, but if it’s to help someone you care about, it doesn’t even feel like a burden."

Liz felt like she understood. Lex was hinting at her to go follow her heart. Or maybe he was telling her that it was okay if she endured a bit of danger if it helped out Levi, her friend. Who knew that Lex could be so wise? She began to see him in a new light, for once. She guessed that after all this time, she couldn’t really think of him as her annoying brother anymore. Instead, he was-

"What I’m saying is, don’t get yourself in trouble inside the Dream realm if you go," Lex suddenly continued, a hint of irritation in his voice. "Because if you get in trouble, I’ll have to go into the Dream realm to rescue you, and I don’t want that burden or that inconvenience. I already have my hands full."

Liz immediately took off her shoe and flung it across the room at Lex! What a way to ruin such a special moment!

Lex could not help but smirk as he dodged the shoe, even as he hid his own concern for her safety. It wasn’t easy bringing her back to the Midnight Realm. He couldn’t help but feel slightly worried now that she wanted to leave.

At the same time, he knew that if he forced her to stay, it would have a negative impact on her mentality.