Dead on Mars

Chapter 13: Sol Two, Grand Art of Dirty Clothes Changing

Translator: CKtalon Editor: CKtalon

The reason Tang Yue hung his pants up in the hall was to do with Tomcat’s restriction on his use of water. Tang Yue couldn’t shower or do laundry without any scruples. Therefore, to reduce the rate at which he stank… Tang Yue decided to use the Grand Art of Dirty Clothes Changing.

This art was mastered by Tang Yue during his college days in a male dormitory. All he needed to do was prepare two sets of clothes and switch between them every day. While wearing one, he would hang the other out to dry. This could ensure that both sets of clothes were dry and clean for an extended period of time, saving him the trouble of doing laundry. Equipped with four years of actual experience while studying for his Bachelor’s degree, Tang Yue successfully proved that this method could delay his stinking by 50%.

But on the Kunlun Station, Tang Yue planned to go one step further.

If it wasn’t necessary, don’t wear clothes.

Since there was no one to see him, it didn’t matter if he wore clothes or not. Not wearing any clothes meant no laundry to do, so it saved him energy and also conserved water.

Tang Yue stood in the hall butt-naked with his arms akimbo. His balls felt a chill from the breeze. To openly walk around naked was a challenge towards his shame as a human. Hence, he pulled out some tin-foiled wrapping, used to insulate crates, and wrapped himself in it. It reached down to his calves, making him look like an ancient Roman draped in a robe.

As he walked, what he called his vacuum robe would flutter in the wind, occasionally showing his two hairy legs that made for quite an enchanting appearance.

Tomcat deemed him the vacuum naked man on Mars.

“Mr. Tang Yue? Mr. Tang Yue?” Mai Dong appeared onscreen. “Have you woken up? Have you eaten… Ah—!”

Tang Yue was taken aback.

“What’s wrong?”

The woman’s face blushed red as she turned her head to the side. She mumbled, “Clothes, Mr. Tang Yue, clothes!”

Tang Yue looked down and was stunned. He quickly stuffed the little guy which had peeped out back into the wrapping.

From the looks of it, he still needed to wear pants in the future.

…

Breakfast was a beef sandwich, a piece of compressed biscuit, and a measuring cylinder of orange juice, as well as a Vitamin C tablet.

The beef sandwich was vacuum packed instant food. It had processed at stabilized heats, so it contained ample moisture in it. There was no need to add any water to it and could be directly consumed by throwing it into the microwave or oven for heating. Therefore, its shelf date wasn’t too long—not more than two years. Tang Yue had to finish such food first; otherwise, they would only end up going bad.

The orange juice was produced by mixing powder with water. Almost all the beverages for space missions were made the same way. Tiny bags of powder granules were mixed with water before they could be consumed. They resembled instant coffee.

However, the taste wasn’t something that could be expressed with a few words… Even though the staff at the nutrition center once indicated that they had tried their best to enhance the taste of the beverages, they were ultimately things that needed to endure the long trip to Mars. Therefore, its shelf date was given priority. Tang Yue always said that the orange juice had a plastic taste to it.

Tang Yue’s daily intake of food needed to provide him with 2,000 calories; otherwise, he wouldn’t have sufficient energy for work.

Tang Yue placed the sandwich on a plate and sliced it with a knife before forking it and placing it into his mouth.

“Mai Dong, have you had breakfast?”

“I’ve eaten.”

“What did you eat?” Tang Yue asked as he chewed.

“Half a biscuit and a cup of water.”

Tang Yue chuckled. He forked a piece of beef and waved it in front of Mai Dong, smiling cheekily, “See this? Do you know what this is? It’s beef. Want some?”

Mai Dong silently gulped.

The computer screen was placed on the work desk in front of Tang Yue, and Mai Dong watched him eat.

“Don’t worry. You will have some soon.” Tang Yue put down his cutlery and moved the camera away, making Mai Dong see the floor behind him. “See those crates? They are full of the food I’m preparing to send you. Once I’m done with the preparation work over here, I’ll send them to you. Hold on a little longer.”

“Yeah, yeah. Mr. Tang Yue, don’t worry about me. I’m not rushing you.”

“How much longer can the food on your side last?” Tang Yue asked. “Don’t force it.”

“Another five days.” Mai Dong grabbed a piece of biscuit from an area beyond the camera’s field of view. She held the biscuit close to the camera for Tang Yue to see it and said, “I still have quite a few biscuits here.”

Tang Yue felt a little relieved.

Tomcat kicked Tang Yue’s chair from behind. “Quickly finish your meal and get to work!”

Tang Yue inwardly cursed Tomcat for his vileness as he obediently stuffed the sandwich into his mouth. No matter how exploitative a landlord was, they still would allow their slaves to have their meals. This was the second sol he had been trapped on Mars, and there was a lot of work he needed to complete. He had to return all the solar panels back to their original spot as everything in Kunlun Station needed electricity. Electricity was the source of life, and Tang Yue needed to ensure that the electricity reserves were always fully charged.

After setting up the solar panels, he still needed to do a thorough check of Kunlun Station. If there were any safety breeches, he needed to eliminate them as soon as possible, but this was also time-consuming and back-breaking work.

Finally, Tang Yue had to labor over the Eagle… He and Tomcat needed to ensure that there was nothing wrong with the Eagle and that it was capable of sending the goods into Mars’s orbit and dock with the United Space Station. If this was decades ago on Earth, it would be a mission that would garner massive attention. It needed several countries to cooperate, from the launch center and optical radar, to the remote satellites following and monitoring the entire process. But now, Tang Yue realized, even including Tomcat there would only be a maximum of three.

And all of this needed to be finished as quickly as possible because Mai Dong lacked food. She wouldn’t last much longer.

Tang Yue lifted the plate vertically and licked clean every crumb from it. This way, he didn’t even need to wash the plate.

Water conservation.

He used the plate as a mirror and found it sparkling clean.

The plate was even cleaner than his face.

Tang Yue got up, picked a clean pair of pants and put his clothes on. Then, he crawled into Radiant Armor… Tang Yue had never attempted wearing Radiant Armor naked. He felt that it was entirely possible for a particularly sharp component to lodge in his balls.

Tomcat helped him zip up his zipper and installed the life support system on him. With an assuring click, it was secured to his EVA suit. After checking that there were no problems with the airtightness, Tang Yue pushed up his light filtering visor. He moved his limbs and joints, and everything was good to go.

“Good luck.” Tomcat patted Tang Yue’s visor and gave a thumbs up.

Tang Yue returned with a thumbs up, paused a little, and turned to wave at Mai Dong, showing her a radiant smile.

The woman was floating in the space station, separated by a millimeter-thick glass screen and four hundred kilometers of space. She waved her hand at him, watching the man clumsily open the hatch to the airlock.