Read Novel Full Chapter 387
Chapter 387
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Author Note: ※ (It has no connection to the main story, so you can skip it)
Chapter 387 – Side Story : A Resonating Nightmare
For some reason, I couldn’t sleep that night and kept falling into short, shallow dozes on the bed in the Wolf’s Tail Pavilion. It wasn’t enough to bother getting up, but my heart was strangely restless. Still, there’s no entertainment in this world for a sleepless night. Kerosene and magic tools are cumbersome to use and expensive to maintain, so they’re basically only used in emergencies. In other words, the night is for sleeping, whether you’re a good boy or not.
After midnight, Myrril, who had been having a nightmare, woke up with a small cry.
“Yo…shua…!”
She looked around with a frightened look on her face, and when she saw me standing next to her, she started to cry.
“A-ah…”
“W-what’s wrong, Mir?”
“You’re still here, aren’t you?”
“Hmm? Yes, I’m here. I’m right here.”
“You’re not going anywhere, are you?”
“That’s right. I’ll always be with you…”
She clings to me as if to hold on for dear life, and I hold her little body in my arms, confused. I notice that her back, which I’m touching, is trembling slightly. She lets out a short sob.
“You said it was a dream.”
Who said that? No, she’s probably still half asleep, so I probably shouldn’t try to get her to talk about it in too much detail.
“I see. You had a scary dream. Maybe you were a little tired. It’s okay, dreams are… dreams.”
“No!”
Myrril looked up at me, eyes wide with fear.
“In front of you were the hero of Saliant, the sage, and the saint. They were lying on the ground, covered in blood…”
…Hmm? Hmm? Were they the skinny guy and the muscular guy? Was that when we fought in Casemaian?
That was a long time ago. No, it’s only been a little over half a year. But why now?
“You were wandering around a strange city with no one around, looking like a corpse. You were wearing the same clothes as when we first met, and you said you were going to the hospital…”
The story took another turn. Strangely, I felt a chill run down my spine.
I know this story.
How many years ago was it? I don’t remember. I think I went crazy from stress during my time as a corporate slave, and my colleagues forced me to take half a day off to go to the hospital. I remember leaving the office before noon and wandering around the city. But no matter how much I think about it, I can’t remember if I went to the hospital or not. I don’t know if I passed that group of three, and even if I did, I don’t remember anything.
The first time I met them was in the castle of Saliant… in the “White Hall,” I think when I was almost killed there.
“That…”
“If you say it was a dream, then maybe it was. When I came to, the place had changed, and I was in a small, dim room with nothing in it. Yoshua was eating a flatbread that you had burned yourself, and you were washing it down with black coffee. I was worried and tried desperately to talk to you, but you didn’t even notice me with your dead eyes. You were right there!”
O-oh…
Judging by the layout and the things in the room, it’s exactly the same as the studio apartment I used to live in. Myrril-san, you saw me eating my office worker’s breakfast.
“Yes, that was me before I met Myrril. I ate the same thing every morning.”
Toast made from frozen bread and instant coffee that had gone off and was damp and tasteless. The breakfast I ate every morning was so bad… I didn’t feel anything at the time, but I guess that’s what people mean when they say you’re chewing sand.
It was a life like being dead.
“But I don’t remember any cute girls coming to visit me, so I guess I couldn’t see them.”
I try to force a smile to hide my excitement, but Myrril can’t seem to relax her worried expression. An inexplicable fear grows in my heart.
What is this?
Why did you tie it to such a sad memory, Myrril? If you wanted to tie it to something, why not something fun or a happy memory?
Come to think of it, I can’t remember any such memories.
“So… what happened after that?”
I had heard that it was bad to follow dreams, but it was too realistic to leave it at that. Or rather, it felt like something that wasn’t a dream.
“Yoshua was in a big room with lots of people, and you were turning over piles of paper with pictures on them.”
Is that what it is? I guess it’s like when I’m at work and organizing my presentation materials. It would be a little embarrassing if my boss saw me. Although it’s a little late for that now.
“No matter how hard I shouted, Yoshua couldn’t see me. My voice couldn’t reach you either. So I just stood there beside you, at a loss…”
Myrril smiled sadly and looked into the distance.
“I asked you if you were happy. At the time, I thought that if it was for your sake that you were in this world, then it was okay.”
A girl stands in the forest, bathed in sunlight filtering through the trees.
A dull pain. It felt like a voice echoing in my head. I hear the voice from that time. I remember the soft smile the girl wore in the daydream I saw that day. I looked up in surprise and found myself in an empty meeting room. The girl I was sure I had seen had become a shadow on the wall. I couldn’t stand the pain in my chest and turned away from the girl who should have been there. Rejecting even the brief escape from reality, I shut myself in a shell that was about to crack and disintegrate.
What did I tell her then?
“This is a dream. This is a dream. A hallucination. An auditory hallucination. It’s just an illusion. Don’t listen to it. Don’t look at it. Don’t recognize it. Don’t accept the voices that are just making things up. You’ll go crazy. If you start reacting to the voices that are echoing in your head, you’ll end up like your predecessor. You, you, you, you–“
I wonder what I felt.
“No, I think I’m going crazy. That’s why I’m like this…”
“It doesn’t matter if I’m happy or not.”
Without thinking, the words came out of my mouth as flat as if I were dead. I muttered them as if I were spitting them out to the girl’s shadow that flickered faintly on the wall of the meeting room. The creaking voice echoed in the empty room.
“This is my work, and this is my life.”
“Happiness? Where is that thing? It’s not there. It’s not anywhere. It can’t be there. It shouldn’t be there. Even if it is there…”
“You can’t see it.”
If I look at the bright side now, I’ll break.
“I see.”
The girl said softly. Then and now.
“””If that is your choice, I will say nothing. May you live well.”””
I found myself crying. I heard three voices. One was my own voice, one was Myrril’s voice and the other…
Was the voice of the girl I had heard that time.
“I have returned, guided by your voice. I came back from that nightmare thanks to you.”
“Yoshua.”
“That’s right. I saw you. I watched you. I heard your voice. And…”
…and now I’m here.
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