Secretly, But Unable to Hide It

Chapter 58

Duan Jiaxu was clearly caught off guard by the reason Sang Zhi gave, his expression momentarily stunned before he quickly broke into laughter, finding it utterly absurd. “What?”

As soon as the words left her mouth, Sang Zhi realized how foolish and silly she sounded. She figured she was probably too tired to think straight. Feeling embarrassed, she fell silent and tried to stand up, supporting herself with one hand on the bed.

Noticing her movement, Duan Jiaxu bent down, grabbed her wrist, and pulled her up with a bit of force. After she found her balance, he placed his other hand on her lower back and pulled her towards him.

Sang Zhi’s head bumped into his chest and she looked up, suddenly feeling nervous. Her hands clenched into fists against his chest and she could feel it vibrating with unrestrained laughter, his mood clearly very good.

Feeling uncomfortable, she tried to step back. “What are you doing—”

Duan Jiaxu’s gaze deepened, with a hint of blatant teasing in his eyes. He raised his brow and, without warning, pressed her onto the bed. His voice was hoarse as he asked, “Like a little thrill?”

“……”

It was as if the world spun around her. In an instant, Sang Zhi found herself lying on the bed, and when she looked up, she saw Duan Jiaxu’s lips.

The mattress was soft and his hand was still supporting her back, so she didn’t feel any pain. But the suddenness of it all made her mind go blank and she didn’t immediately grasp the meaning of his words.

Duan Jiaxu was still smiling. “Hmm?”

Sang Zhi blinked slowly and finally came back to her senses. She took a deep breath and tried to push him away, shouting in anger and embarrassment, “Duan Jiaxu!”

He was completely unfazed. Leaning in close to her ear, his voice was low and ambiguous as he said, “How about we have a little fun?”

“……”

Sang Zhi’s breath hitched and her neck and cheeks turned bright red in an instant as if they were on fire, burning intensely. She felt like her heart was about to jump out of her chest and she forced herself to calm down, staring straight at him.

He wasn’t holding her down, just propping himself up on the bed.

Sang Zhi pressed her lips together, then extended her leg and forcefully pushed him to the side.

The difference in strength between men and women was evident. Duan Jiaxu raised his brow but didn’t resist, going along with her push and lying down beside her.

Sang Zhi sat up, gritting her teeth. “What kind of rouge are you playing?!”

Duan Jiaxu lay on his side, propping his face with one hand, his expression utterly carefree. “How is it playing rouge if we’re together?”

“……”

It indeed didn’t seem quite accurate.

Besides, he hadn’t actually done anything too overboard.

Sang Zhi decided not to argue with him anymore, rubbing her temples as she moved to the edge of the bed, intending to get down.

Noticing her movement, Duan Jiaxu pulled her back, his lashes lifting as he stared at her forehead, finally noticing the red mark. “Did you bump it?”

She pointed at the edge of the bed and murmured, “I accidentally knocked into it.”

Duan Jiaxu asked, “Does it hurt?”

Sang Zhi shook her head. “Not really.”

“Tell me,” Duan Jiaxu said with a smile, “how did you end up on the floor?”

Sang Zhi replied honestly, “I suddenly felt sleepy.”

“Then why didn’t you sleep on the bed?”

“I was afraid you’d think I said all those things to ignore you.” Sang Zhi murmured, “But I really need to study. I have an exam tomorrow afternoon and I want to do well.”

“I’m not that petty.” Duan Jiaxu said, “Go to sleep, I’ll wake you up later.”

Sang Zhi muttered, “But won’t you be bored?”

“A little.”

“Then I’ll finish studying quickly—”

Duan Jiaxu smiled. “Are you that scared of me getting upset?”

Sang Zhi glanced at him as if silently admitting it.

“I asked you to come here to study. Of course, I had my own reasons,” Duan Jiaxu said gently, “but I didn’t plan on distracting you. My Zhizhi is motivated, how could I hold you back?”

Sang Zhi cautiously asked, “Then, can I sleep?”

“Sleep.” Duan Jiaxu kissed the back of her hand, his eyes curving in a smile. “It might be a bit boring, but knowing you’re here makes me very happy.”

Sang Zhi dove under the covers.

Not long after, Duan Jiaxu came in with a warm towel and pressed it against the spot where she had bumped her head, saying as he did, “Did you hide because you heard me opening the door?”

Sang Zhi hesitantly nodded.

Duan Jiaxu’s lips curved up. “Silly.”

Her face was half-buried in the blanket so her voice sounded a bit muffled as she said, “I was just nervous for a moment.”

“Even if you’re nervous, you should’ve just stayed still.” Duan Jiaxu stood up and drew the curtains, blocking out the sunlight outside. “What if you had a serious fall?”

Sang Zhi thought for a moment, then suddenly called out to him, “Brother Jiaxu.”

“Hmm?”

“Well, you know,” Sang Zhi licked her lips and explained, “when you get too close, I also feel a little bit nervous. Like just now. But I wasn’t angry, and I didn’t dislike it……”

Duan Jiaxu removed the towel from her forehead, his tone casual, “So, you liked it?”

Sang Zhi forced out, “I don’t like thrills……”

Duan Jiaxu laughed out loud. “Alright, we won’t do anything thrilling for now.”

“……”

“We’ll save it for later.”

“……”

Sang Zhi ended up staying at Duan Jiaxu’s place until 10:00 PM. Most of the time, she was studying, and eventually, she didn’t mind having Duan Jiaxu around.

One studied, while the other lay on the bed reading.

It was surprisingly harmonious.

When one of her roommates texted that the dormitory had electricity again, Sang Zhi started packing her things, ready to leave. She walked over to the TV cabinet and, with practiced ease, took out a packet of gummies.

Then they put on their shoes and stepped out the door.

As Sang Zhi was tearing off the packaging of the candy, she casually asked, “Brother Jiaxu, do you want some?”

Duan Jiaxu wasn’t interested in snacks, so he just pinched her cheek. “You eat it.”

Sang Zhi popped one into her mouth. “Oh.”

The two entered the elevator.

Suddenly, Duan Jiaxu spoke again, holding out his hand in front of her, his tone relaxed, “On second thought, give me one.”

Sang Zhi obediently handed him a piece, placing it in his palm.

Before she could withdraw her hand, Duan Jiaxu closed his fingers around her fingertips, not letting go. He raised his brow slowly, asking, “Giving me candy or holding hands?”

Sang Zhi was puzzled. “Didn’t you want to eat candy?”

Duan Jiaxu asked again, “Holding hands or holding hands?”

She finally understood. “Oh……”

Duan Jiaxu repeated, “Holding hands?”

Sang Zhi looked up at him, finding his seriousness a bit amusing. She laughed, her words slightly garbled by the candy in her mouth, “You’re so serious about it.”

Duan Jiaxu didn’t seem the least bit embarrassed. “So, will you hold my hand or not?”

Sang Zhi used her other hand to take the candy back and blinked. “I will.”

Duan Jiaxu chuckled softly and took her hand. Just then the elevator reached the first floor and he led her out, casually asking, “Planning to find an internship during the summer?”

“Yeah.” Sang Zhi was unwrapping another candy. “I applied to several companies and one called me for an interview.”

“Why are you looking for an internship so early?”

“To keep busy.” Sang Zhi said, “Otherwise, I’d have nothing to do at home and just be alone every day.”

They walked a bit further.

Sang Zhi suddenly asked, “Do you still want the candy?”

Duan Jiaxu replied, “No.”

“Brother Jiaxu,” Sang Zhi kicked a small stone on the ground and brought up, “other people hold hands while crossing the street or just suddenly, but you always ask first.”

“Last time, I didn’t ask before kissing you.” Duan Jiaxu said slowly, “And you weren’t happy about it, were you?”

Sang Zhi was silent for a couple of seconds. “……I wasn’t unhappy.”

Duan Jiaxu prompted, “Hmm?”

Sang Zhi added, “I was just a bit embarrassed.”

“Mm.”

“Well, I think I never told you,” Sang Zhi lowered her head, thought carefully for a moment, and then stumbled through the rest of her words, “I really like you.”

Duan Jiaxu turned his head, looking at her slightly nervous profile.

The two walked towards Duan Jiaxu’s parking spot. The neighborhood was quiet at night, with few people coming and going. The streetlights were dim, obscured by large leaves, casting fragmented shadows on the ground.

In the heat of midsummer, even the night wind was stifling.

Hearing her words, Duan Jiaxu suddenly stopped walking and pulled her into his arms. He leaned down, brushing his nose against hers. His deep-set eyes focused on her bright ones, and his lips seemed ready to touch hers at any moment.

After a long while, he lifted his chin and gently kissed her forehead.

It was as if he treasured her immensely.

“Mm, I really like you too.”

———pr

This translation is by Pocketrobbin at S h a n g h a i f a n t a s y . c o m

After finishing her second-to-last exam, Sang Zhi left the examination room. There were no more exams that afternoon but she had an interview later, so she planned to go back to the dormitory to change her clothes before heading over.

Sang Zhi took out her phone from her bag and opened it to take a look.

She happened to see that Sang Yan had called her.

Sang Zhi called him back.

Sang Yan’s voice came from the other end, sounding as irritating as ever, “Little Brat, your brother has been busy with his love life recently, so I forgot about someone as unimportant as you……”

“……”

Sang Yan asked, “Did you book your ticket?”

Sang Zhi replied, “I’m not going back.”

There was instant silence on the other end, then a laugh of disbelief. His previously casual tone also turned serious, “Say that again?”

“I told Mom and Dad.” Sang Zhi felt a little uneasy at his tone, but she didn’t think she had done anything wrong, so she spoke without guilt, “They both agreed.”

“Say that again.”

“……” Sang Zhi got annoyed. “I’m just staying here to find an internship, I haven’t done anything wrong!”

“Fine, I don’t care.” Sang Yan said coldly, “If you get tricked again this time, don’t come crying to me. I don’t have that much time to deal with you.”

Sang Zhi argued, “How will I get tricked?”

“You’ve been in a rebellious phase for so long, ever since middle school. Now you’re in college and still don’t know how to behave?” Sang Yan continued, “You were already brainless, and now that you’re in love, you’re even more brainless.”

Sang Zhi was furious. “You’re the brainless one! It’s you who needs to announce your relationship to the world, bragging that others are chasing after you. Who would believe it?”

“……” Sang Yan said, “Are you trying to pick a fight?”

“You started it.”

They were at a standoff for a moment.

“Sang Zhi, think about it. If you had any sense, would I need to worry about you like this?” Sang Yan calmed down, speaking slowly, “Do whatever you want. Whether something happens or not, don’t come looking for me.”

With that, he hung up the phone.

Sang Zhi put down her phone and stared at the screen. Her mood had instantly worsened and she felt a lump of frustration stuck in her chest. She and Sang Yan rarely argued like this. Usually, when things got heated, he would relent.

Although neither of them ever said anything nice to the other, Sang Zhi was indeed very dependent on him.

Even though she still felt upset, she didn’t want to stay in a cold war with him.

She thought, if she hadn’t gone to Yihe during her first year of high school, Sang Yan probably wouldn’t have stopped her this time.

It was likely because of that time that Sang Zhi’s image in his mind became that of a child who valued love over everything else.

Brainless, easily deceived, believing whatever the guy said.

Sang Zhi scratched her head and opened her chat window with Sang Yan. She thought, if she confessed that the person she was dating was Duan Jiaxu, he probably wouldn’t be so angry, right…..?

He couldn’t possibly not trust Duan Jiaxu.

After some consideration, Sang Zhi typed out a message, 【Brother, you really don’t need to worry. I’m just finding an internship for the summer to keep myself busy. I’ll come home for National Day. I was lying to you before. The boyfriend I found isn’t a graduate student from our school. You know him, it’s Brother Jiaxu. He’s not a bad person.】

She read over it, then hesitated.

Would Duan Jiaxu get beaten up by Sang Yan?

Sang Zhi put herself in his shoes for a moment. If it were her friend dating Sang Yan……

It didn’t seem that unacceptable.

Relieved, Sang Zhi hit send.

A red exclamation mark immediately appeared in front of the speech bubble.

【Notification: Message sent but rejected by the recipient.】

Sang Zhi: “……”

Fine.

Her temper flared up again.

She looked down.

She! Was! So! Stupid!

———pr

The company Sang Zhi was interviewing with was a small one located near the school, only two subway stops away. Following the address, she entered the office building and went up to the designated floor.

The company wasn’t very large, with three rows of desks arranged inside, a small area with sofas, and a small meeting room. There weren’t many people there for the interview. Besides her, there was only one other guy who looked about her age.

The guy went into the meeting room first for the interview.

Sang Zhi waited outside where a woman poured her a cup of water. She politely thanked the other party and instinctively glanced around. This company seemed to be newly established and there weren’t many employees.

Most of the desks were empty.

Sang Zhi’s gaze shifted and paused on a certain woman for two seconds.

The woman was talking to a man and seemed to be in a good mood, smiling brightly. Sang Zhi didn’t want to stare for too long and quickly looked away, afraid of being noticed.

For some reason, she felt the woman looked familiar……

Not long after, the guy came out and signaled that Sang Zhi could go in.

She nodded, refocused, and walked inside.

The interview ended just after 11:00 PM.

Sang Zhi checked the time and calculated that if she took the subway to Duan Jiaxu’s company, she could find a café to hang out at until he got off work. Duan Jiaxu had mentioned before that he usually ordered takeout with his colleagues for lunch and wouldn’t go out to eat.

She unlocked her phone and sent him a message on WeChat, 【Look out the window.】

【Duan Jiaxu: You came over?】

Sang Zhi took a sip of her coffee, smiling. 【No.】

【Sang Zhi: Just wanted you to enjoy the view.】

【Duan Jiaxu: Okay.】

【Duan Jiaxu: If you say so.】

【Sang Zhi: Want to have lunch together?】

【Duan Jiaxu: What do you want to eat?】

【Sang Zhi: How about some barbecue?】

【Duan Jiaxu: Sure.】

Sang Zhi didn’t bother him further and typed, 【I’m taking the subway now, I should be there when you get off work.】

Feeling a bit bored, she downloaded a puzzle game to pass the time. After clearing a level, she didn’t know how much time had passed when Duan Jiaxu finally sent her another message.

Sang Zhi opened it and realized it was already a quarter past 12:00.

【Duan Jiaxu: Turn around.】

Sang Zhi froze for a moment and, at the same time, noticed out of the corner of her eye that someone was standing next to her. She immediately guessed what was going on and instinctively turned her head.

The person beside her bent down at that moment, lowering his head so that his face was close to hers.

Sang Zhi tilted her head, and as if by accident, her lips brushed against his cheek. Her body stiffened before she leaned back, instantly locking eyes with Duan Jiaxu.

He straightened up, a small smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, and his tone teasing and playful, “I only told you to turn around, why are you kissing me?”