Stranger's Handbook

Chapter 51: When There’s no Toilet Around, Do it in a Cup!

With countless shouts of joy in the background, Toto was trembling slightly……

Do I go search for a toilet?

Impossible, we won’t make it…..

Then, I tell her to endure?

This is also impossible; she seems she’s reached her limit……

I took a cup of tea and drank it up hurriedly.

“Toto, it can’t be helped. Use this. We will buy you some time, so you should feel at ease.”

With a refreshing smile, I offered her the cup.

If a human would do something like this, I’m sure they’ll get arrested or something, but she’s a spirit, so there shouldn’t be any problem, right?

Please, let it not be a problem…..

Afraid, I looked at Bea.

It seemed she was all right; she was nodding at everything I was saying, with a serious expression on her face.

(I understand. I’ll do my best!)

I decided I wouldn’t ask what was there for her to do her best for.

There are things in the world you’re better off not knowing.

We left Toto in the waiting room and walked towards the terrace.

When we showed up in front of the people, the cheers got even louder.

There were tens of thousands of people outside.

And they were all focusing their attention on us.

It was rather intense.

I somehow managed to put a smile on my face and wave my hand.

Bea was…..as expected.

She was wearing a magnificent smile, waving her hand at the people.

There are things only noble women can do.

After a short while, Toto came floating on the terrace as well.

Her smile was filled with kindness, and she looked just like a goddess.

In reality, she was only happy and refreshed after doing her ‘stuff’……

I’ll just be silent about it…………..

After we smiled and waved our hands in front of the people for a while, the ceremony of our debut was over.

We returned to the waiting room, together with the Emperor.

“Oh dear, we’ve finally completed the first stage.”

He threw himself down into a chair and drank some tea.

The Emperor was extremely thirsty or something, since he drank that cup of ‘tea’ in one single breath.

……………..That cup…………was it for his Majesty?…………..

We too sat down and a maid came to bring us some tea.

“In the afternoon, we will have the title bestowing ceremony in the audience room.”

The Emperor said, after he got his cup of tea replenished.

“As you wish.”

“As you wish.”

We both lowered our heads in a bow.

“Stop it, yours Excellencies, Duke and Duchess. You can act more familiar with me now.”

Grinning, the Emperor took a sip of his newly prepared tea.

Hm? Why did he lean his head to the side just now?

“Hmm, well, you are duke and duchess from now on, and also my relatives. I’ll be relying on you. As for your domain, I’ll discuss it first with the Frontier Count, and we’ll come up with a decision afterwards. I’m planning on giving you a part of my territory and a part of the Frontier Count’s territory. It should be all right.”

“Certainly, your Majesty.”

“Yes, your Majesty.”

“Haha, Bea, you’re still stiff. I don’t mind treating you like a daughter of mine, you know?”

The Emperor smiled mischievously.

Bea showed a bitter smile, but she didn’t seem to hate it.

She seemed rather perplexed.

Toto was gulping down her tea at her own pace…….You’ll be full again, you know?

We were chatting idly, when the door opened and the Prime Minister came in.

“Excuse me for interrupting your pleasant talk, your Majesty, yours Excellencies, Duke and Duchess.”

He said and bowed his head.

“Oh, it’s already the time? Zest, Bea, I have something to talk with the Prime Minister first, so you can relax and wait for now. I will send someone for you later.”

He patted me on the shoulder rather vigorously then left the room together with the Prime Minister.

His Majesty seems quite busy.

I thought that highly positioned people relax in a chair and give orders around, but it seems I was wrong.

I asked a maid about our lunch, and it seemed we were going to have it here.

It was soon the time for it.

I had to kill some time, so I played a bit with Bea and Toto.

Lately, Toto seems to enjoy playing ‘Look this way!’ (1)

Immediately after a loss, she wants to play again.

Being too energetic, she often ends up touching Bea’s chest region, at which point her breasts start bouncing. This was also great.

After we finished our lunch, Bea took Toto to the toilet.

It’d be too troublesome if she starts saying again she can’t endure it anymore.

After doing her ‘stuff’ properly on a toilet this time, Toto was in a very good mood.

As expected, she didn’t really like doing it in a cup.

Obviously.

It’s difficult to confirm whether a spirit feels shame or not, but I bet she didn’t like peeing in a cup inside the waiting room.

(Mom made me wear this! How do I look?)

She said, and showed me her new ribbon.

“You look great, Toto, you’re very cute.”

She puffed up with pride.

Haha, she truly is cute.

We both brushed this extremely cute Toto’s hair, when the maid came for us.

“It is time. Please follow me.”

The maid assured us that everything was prepared so we followed after her.

After the title bestowing ceremony, this day will be over.

Just for a bit longer I’ll do my best.

……..I got to buy some presents too.

I was worrying about the souvenirs I would have to buy later, when I realized we already arrived in front of the audience room.

Behind these doors, the Emperor and the nobles are waiting for us.

Good!

I motivated myself once again and looked at the soldiers guarding the doors, nodding to them.

The doors were opened slowly.

(Come to think of it, the Majesty uncle guy ended up drinking from the cup I used, didn’t he?)

We received this shocking telepathic message right when his Majesty, sitting on an extravagant chair, came in sight………..

Bea and I were desperately trying to refrain ourselves from bursting out laughing.

It was the beginning of an audience, during which we were not allowed to laugh.

___________

(1) ‘Acchi muite hoi’ (look this way) is the second part of ‘Janken’ (rock-paper-scissors), when you point your finger and the other party has to look the other way, or they lose (you can check on YouTube if you want ^^).